RECKSTAR

Few families held to the old ways like the Wyomings of Cletus 9 —
and no tradition was older or better loved than the ancient Earth holiday of Exmas; a month-long memorial commemorating the efforts of merchants everywhere to provide the shiniest, most desirable trinkets to their adoring masses.

Lights were strung in trees to emulate the neon signs of the largest retail outlets, and ornaments were hung to represent the hotly contested merchandise within.

Often, celebrators would hold “tree trimming parties,” in which everyone in attendance simultaneously rushed the Exmas tree with pruning shears,  elbowing each other aside as they trimmed away the branches, searching for the hidden lump of coal known as the “Black Friday Special.” Whoever found the special held it over their head, shouting, “I’m better than you!” and for the rest of the day that person was allowed to treat everyone else poorly.

Exmas was an especially fun time for children, who delighted in trying to catch their parents red-handed sneaking gifts under the tree. Any parent so caught was subject to the worst public humiliation — wearing a fat suit, fake beard, and red pointy hat, they were forced to stand in the middle of the most popular gathering place in their area, ringing bells to call attention to their shame. Children called these unfortunate souls “Santas” and pelted them with cookies.

Although the Union of Worlds has yet to acknowledge Exmas as an official intergalactic holiday (despite efforts by Earth lobbyists to have it added to Union charters), it is still regularly practiced wherever the human spirit endures.

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We at team Reckstar wish to extend the warmest Exmas greetings to you and your consumer demographic.